Denizen: Only Partially Privileged

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Denizens of the ocean? I just heard that expression on TV and they were talking about how glaciers finally fall into the ocean and join "the denizens of the ocean". Denizens?

denizen |ˈdenəzən|
noun formal or humorous
an inhabitant or occupant of a particular place : denizens of field and forest.
• Brit., historical a foreigner allowed certain rights in the adopted country.

It seems like from the Dictionary on my iMac that the "z" got put into the term because it has to do with citizen. Denization is the process by which a foreigner becomes a naturalized citizen.

Here is a description from the Thesaurus: denizen
noun
formal the denizens of Grant's Hollow were a quirky lot: inhabitant, resident, townsman, townswoman, native, local; occupier, occupant, dweller; archaic burgher.

The term "denizen" gets rare usage these days because of the various countries developing complex naturalization systems. It gets used a lot just to describe an eccentric person who came from some other culture. Back when I used to travel alone all over North America I was nearly always considered a denizen. Sometime I was even asked, "Where you a denizen of... boy?"

I was called a "boy" just about everywhere I went. I was a bum. Politically, I was considered a failed state. White trash. A nigger. But, niggers held a higher social class than me, as did all the Latino laborers. Being a failed state deserves no respect. The strangers in the strange lands I visited has no way of knowing how far I fell to be-co-me a bum. All they knew was what they saw sot before them right then and there.

At best, I might be considered a denizen and allowed certain privileges of their community as long as I didn't get out of line. The hard part was that any citizen of the place I found myself had say so over whether I was measuring up to their interpretation of the local moral values.

I had to learn to survive in these situations. Many, if not most of my defense tactics when faced with confrontation would be simply to disappear into the woodworks and let my antagonist find their own way back home without me. Other times that simply didn't work. I was on their turf, and they knew most of the hiding places where I could be out of sight and therefore out of mind.

My living this way for nearly a decade caused me to pay close attention when I read what Carl Jung wrote about religion:

"Religion is a defense against the experience of God." ~ C. G. Jung

The reason I paid so much attention to this quote is that, to me, it points to the only way I know of finding out what my real religion is. It's by reflecting on what I defended myself against out there on the road where I lived hand-to-mouth without pretenses.

Sometime it absolutely astounds me for other people to even consider that I would follow their rules of conscience as if they were my own rules of conscience. They want me to let their conscience be my guide. It's not that I wouldn't pretend, at least, to do that if I could.

Unfortunately, when they tell me to or indicate that I somehow should follow their rules of conscience, I only hear them saying what I might say if I were them, and doing what I do for their reasons instead of my own.

In consideration of the futility of that, I seem to have spent most of my adult life trying to uncover and dispense with my own rules of conscience as burdensome baggage. If I pull this off, will I then have any reason at all to continue trying to be a real little boy instead of a wooden doll?

I seem to be associating my earthly plight with Pinocchio more and more these days. As I am is the docetic spirit who, despite all my efforts, cannot become a human being. Oh, well....
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