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I just had a big thrill. I discovered that something is looking out for me. I've written of how I've been having problems with the noise-canceling headphones fitting over my entire ear, and when it's warm, it gets damp in the ear cups of the earphones. I worried about fungi developing inside the cup of my ear phones yesterday. Recently, I became aware that the silver colloids I make kill fungi, so I lightly sprayed the inside of the cups with silver colloids. It's a can't lose situation.
That's not the good part though. It wasn't until today that I thought about spraying a mist of silver colloids inside my outer ear canals. The reason I thought about doing that was a news item about the problems people have with "swimmer's ear". In the swampy coastal plains the very humid air is enough to cause the fungus that develops with swimmer's ear to grow uncomfortable. It was only after I sprayed the silver colloid solution into my ear canals, and only after a wad of earwax etcera fell out of my right ear, that I realized part of the pain I've been having with my throat has been that the left side of head and my eustachian tube hurt like crazy.
It was only then that I realized the sequence of events that stimulated me to do the right thing was no coincidence. As soon as I sprayed the silver colloid solution into my left ear it felt better. Much better. The fungi there immediately stopped attacking the inside of my ear canal, and started defending it's very existence. Whoopeee! It can't win. I cured all the fungus problems I had with my feet with silver as an antibiotic.
I literally thought the sore place on the left side of my tongue was spreading to the entire left side of my punkin' haid. I felt doomed. As good as dead. The next stop was for it to get inside my brain. Dead man walking. I'm a very excitable person when it comes to diagnosing my own death. Every day of my life it's just around the corner. Whatta wimp!
I just had a big thrill. I discovered that something is looking out for me. I've written of how I've been having problems with the noise-canceling headphones fitting over my entire ear, and when it's warm, it gets damp in the ear cups of the earphones. I worried about fungi developing inside the cup of my ear phones yesterday. Recently, I became aware that the silver colloids I make kill fungi, so I lightly sprayed the inside of the cups with silver colloids. It's a can't lose situation.
That's not the good part though. It wasn't until today that I thought about spraying a mist of silver colloids inside my outer ear canals. The reason I thought about doing that was a news item about the problems people have with "swimmer's ear". In the swampy coastal plains the very humid air is enough to cause the fungus that develops with swimmer's ear to grow uncomfortable. It was only after I sprayed the silver colloid solution into my ear canals, and only after a wad of earwax etcera fell out of my right ear, that I realized part of the pain I've been having with my throat has been that the left side of head and my eustachian tube hurt like crazy.
It was only then that I realized the sequence of events that stimulated me to do the right thing was no coincidence. As soon as I sprayed the silver colloid solution into my left ear it felt better. Much better. The fungi there immediately stopped attacking the inside of my ear canal, and started defending it's very existence. Whoopeee! It can't win. I cured all the fungus problems I had with my feet with silver as an antibiotic.
I literally thought the sore place on the left side of my tongue was spreading to the entire left side of my punkin' haid. I felt doomed. As good as dead. The next stop was for it to get inside my brain. Dead man walking. I'm a very excitable person when it comes to diagnosing my own death. Every day of my life it's just around the corner. Whatta wimp!
All I was aware of at first when I became lucid was my doing Tai Chi. I don't know how to do it. I just always wanted to learn. But, here I was in my dream doing it with grace and style. Then, I realized I was mimicking this Asian woman in front of me that I didn't know personally. I guess I became aware enough during my dream to realize I could finally learn how to do it by watching YouTube videos if I still wanted to practice it.
The next thing i knew was that I had some electronic equipment that I was going to use for something. I didn't know exactly what. Before I could put the equipment together to do with it whatever I was gonna do, these two young men pushed me aside, and started taking it apart and deciding it should go this way or that way, and I was confused and kind of mad that I had forgotten what I first had the stuff for. Eventually, I realized who these guys were, and they were with a beautiful young woman who some called "the swamp woman".
I had a frustrating time with these people. I had been running around all over the country on my vision quest alone for years. Nobody knew my real name. I was just this guy. Then, all sorts of visionary things happened due to my using a lotta psychedelics, including my remembering vision, and all of a sudden this group of people formed around me.
Instead of being a faceless bum, I became an odd sort of leader with several hundred followers who claimed I was the returned Christ even though I had openly renounced Christianity for myself. I didn't have a clue about their motivation or why they figured they needed a leader, but it was during the time of sex, drugs, and rock and roll. They all would have sex with me at the snap of my finger, so I didn't really question why they thought I was special.
This dream last night went on and on. Before I woke up I knew a lot more about what happened back in those days. One of the things I never understood happened this one time when I was going to leave that town for a while. These people were starting to do things they thought would please me, and they were doing it in my name, and some of it was very illegal and I'd have to be responsible for it. The problem was that I didn't know what they had done until after it happened. I decided the best thing for me to do was get the fuck out of Dodge.
When I mentioned that I was gonna leave, they wanted me to decide who would be the leader of the group while I was gone. I didn't care by this time, so I arbitrarily chose this one guy that I liked okay. I thought he would enjoy the attention, but it was apparently the wrong choice, and the right choice guy got mad at me such that I never saw him alive again.
It's very sad to remember people like what got dead before their time after I wasn't around any more. I didn't know many of these people but for a year or so. Why some of them survived to get old and why others didn't has always been a mystery to me. During that period I couldn't stay in one place very long.
It was after that era that I returned to Key West for the winter, as I had been doing for several winters, but this time I met the woman who was to become my second wife, and I never had any followers after that. When I met her I stopped writing the poetry that gathered people to me. Now, she's gone, and our children with her. For the last thirty years or so I've lived alone as a social pariah among the decent people of the world, and that's just the way it is. Back to basics.
My brother's female dog apparently slept on the second floor deck outside my bedroom last night. She kept barking at something off and on during the night. When I woke up this morning and started to write my dreams down, she scratched on the door and whimpered a little to get me to open the door. I let her in for a minute, and she seem overjoyed to see me.
I think she can smell me dying. I smell like I'm dying to myself. This woman I got to know over the internet recently wrote an unoriginal e-mail to tell me I'm an idiot, also told me that cancer doesn't hurt until toward the end. In that case, the end is near. The soreness on my tongue seems to get better, until I wake up during the night, and discover to my extreme displeasure that it's not better. C'est la morte!
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