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A friend woke me up yesterday morning. He brought me a walking stick he had decorated, and took me out for breakfast before I'd even performed my morning toiletries. I give him my digital camera in which the shutter was stuck, so I don't know if I did him any favors. The camera had hardly been used, and that's why the shutter was stuck. I'm hoping he'll be able to get it unstuck and use it. At least he will use it.
After he left I went back to bed and stayed there all day. I got up again about dark, and went back to bed around mid-night, and then got up again this morning around five-thirty. It's cold. About as cold as it gets here except for unusual conditions. Not cold like its cold up north, but pipe-busting cold around here.
I don't have any heat but for small room heaters, so I'm dressed inside my house as if I were outside in Arctic weather. I have one space heater here in my bedroom where I keep my computer, and another downstairs in my kitchen to protect my water pipes from freezing.
It works out pretty good. I don't use the downstairs heater except when the temps head down toward 20 degrees (-6.666 C), and I cut off the upstairs heater every night when I go to bed and crawl under the electric blanket. In the early morning hours today I realized I gotta start using the down comforter I've been holding back on. If I'm warm in bed I can stand anything.
Testing myself against the elements is part of having Scorpio as my "rising sign" in my natal astrology chart. It also means that I test the other too. It took a long time for me to realize I was doing that, and only then because I have a framework for finding stuff like that out.
It would be difficult for me to accuse people who don't have a framework for finding out about the way they can possibly see the world. It's because when I look at the shabby way I live others can find no reward for emulating my behavior. That may not be the exact reason I don't provide other people with unsolicited advice, but it comes close.
Who am I to tell other people its okay to live like a bum? I'm practically cruel to other people to do it. Cruel to all the people who think I should be more responsible to them if they love me. All of them are much better off because I haven't helped them, so they learned to help themselves. I don't ask anything of anybody much, much less than I give to them. But, I would say that, wouldn't I...
Last night, when my youngest brother and next door neighbor went out walking in the dark back in the woods mostly with his dogs the Army helicopters using the local airport for war games was so loud we couldn't hear each other talk even when we were only two feet apart. They have begun to do this at least four days a week. Sometimes for 10-12 hours a day.
I feel like we're being attacked by our own Army. If I had any real psychic power I could make them go away, but I got nothing. I'm helpless to influence their decisions, and am afraid if I complained about the Homeland Security people would come knocking on my door in the middle of the night like the Gestapo did, accuse me of being unpatriotic by complaining about the noise, and send me to Guantanamo for mental realignment.
America is a police state in which its citizens are it's victims. It seems worse lately. If I don't write an entry for a while you will know they've read this blog and hauled me off. I don't have many complaints about having gotten to live in a free America, but my children and grandchildren will never know that privilege. "Gone are the days..."
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I do not attempt to tell the God's own truth here because I don't know what the truth is or hardly ever. I try to capture the drifting thoughts that randomly appear in my imagination for reasons I may not understand. I don't know if the content I capture with these words is true or false. The Comments settings are turned off to prevent me from having to defend what amounts to little more than fanciful, sometime crude speculation. Great moments in our lives never return.
