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While asking myself how many times I've worked myself into a lather by thinking I've discovered a brilliant approach to solving all my current health problems, I got distracted by a more practical solution which I hadn't put two and two together with yet.
Two trains of thought have provided cause for me to think I may be on to something that might work for the betterment of my well-being. Recently, I've been lead to believe the arthritis problems I've been diagnosed with are due to my own immune system turning against me. Not that it's personal, but one of the reasons why arthritis and other related dis-eases pop up inconveniently. The prescription drugs I take are partially designed to weaken my immune system to reverse it's unhelpful behavior.
The other way of thinking about my life that I've encountered recently is some double-blind research into vegetarianism, the results of which indicated that a strict vegetarian diet lowers the immune system. Supposedly, having a hyped up immune system is the source of my health problems. Could eating vegetarian eliminate my need for drugs to lower my immune system? Nothing ventured... ?
Another thing is that I went on this Atkins-like diet that made eating a lot of meat a good thing, and then another report that stated that eating a lot of processed meat like sausages and tuna and wieners, and junk food in general causes a lot of problems if that's most of your diet. Like my stupid diet.
Eating right can be a big deal for people who prefer to live alone if they're not cautious about doing right by themselves. Sometimes I think it's because eating together is one of the more enjoyable parts of being with someone. I'm not particularly happy to be living alone, it's just that it ain't worth it to the other to have to live with my crude domestic ways.
Between being an out and out homeless bum for many years, and working industrial construction jobs (that almost always happened in remote areas because of the pollution of what we built caused), the opportunity to sit down with people I loved to enjoy a home-cooked meal has been a rare event in my life since my childhood days when we ate what we grew in our family garden.
Probably the best eating I ever consistently did was when I was in the Navy. It's a little sad to say that I hadn't realized what a mediocre cook my mother was until I joined the Navy. She was an okay cook and we never went too hungry. She was born in 1911, so the Great Depression was in full swing all during her twenties.
I don't think any other kind of experience can provide the same affect on a people than depression and famine. My parents reacted like the other people who endured the Depression. They couldn't let it go. They seemed obsessed by teaching their children what they needed to know to survive such a time. The economic stability of the country is threatened again. Many of the pundits who usually take a sunny view of current conditions aren't smiling anymore.
It didn't help that I was a natural born miser when my parents taught me to do everything for myself and not depend on nobody. I certainly didn't know that avarice is my chief feature, and that being greedy was emphasized in the enneagram system for thinking about things.
Learning a goodly number of oracular systems designed for figuring what's wot has it's advantages, but seeing through the masquerades can be dispiriting too. I had studied or familiarized myself with the major occult systems like astrology, the Tarot, palm reading, and more profoundly the classical system of the Book of Changes (I Ching).
None of this system play revealed the Enneagram's method of showing this greed thing to me in a way I could understand it. I'm a bum. A wino. I got no respect for what matters to a lotta people. I constantly give everything I acquire away to keep from being it's janitor. How can I possibly consider myself a greedy, miserly person? Aye, and there's the rub, but it's a killer.
I will fight to the death to keep what I need to get away from everybody to contemplate my own life. There's a real good chance I would allow my most devoted friends to die if their sacrifice was needed to go my own way. By betraying them I betray myself, and thus, I'm victimized by my own victims. What a drag, man. You might not believe how many people have claimed to want to be just like me when they grow up. "Me? You gotta be kidding."
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I do not attempt to tell the God's own truth here because I don't know what the truth is or hardly ever. I try to capture the drifting thoughts that randomly appear in my imagination for reasons I may not understand. I don't know if the content I capture with these words is true or false. The Comments settings are turned off to prevent me from having to defend what amounts to little more than fanciful, sometime crude speculation. Great moments in our lives never return.
